“Apology to the black woman” A response

Today I read an article by Nojma Muhammad titled “An open letter of apology to black men in hopes of reconciliation” on the site thyblackman.com. Initially it saddened me, although I admit there were a few valid points I sympathized with. I was saddened by the way they were expressed, as if the black woman was to blame for the plights of the black man. The black women is the foundation, the base and the support system of the black family. She ties and binds the family together. The black man is the head of the home and he leads. The best way to break a structure and destroy it is to break the foundation, the base in which it stands; the black woman.

To break the black woman, which lead to the breaking of black men, began centuries ago. They raped the black woman, demeaning and demonizing her further when they saw that enslaving her and beating her didn’t break her. Stripped her of all that was woman, the one thing she should control. They impregnated our bodies, bastardizing our children setting a standard for future generations. Our children, they ripped from our nursing breast and protecting arms, to sell like hogs. No longer could they hide from the world behind our torn skirts and seek love in our eyes. They broke the black woman, making our queens seem less in everyone’s eyes. Yes, including our black men that now find our hair too nappy, lips too big, our brown skin like theirs too brown. They showcased our bodies for our curves and thickness that was foreign to them, now our black men now continue the tradition by showcasing our curves and thickness in media. The Saartjie Baartman’s of film, magazines and music videos. They dehumanize black women and made black men feel we weren’t a prize to be won. They did make us hate ourselves, which made you hate us. Made you envy their porcelain beauties, while veiling and mocking the beauty of your women. They taught us that light is right, made us hate our hair that was too nappy and kinky, our big lips, wide noses, curved figures because there was a time when curves weren’t “it”. They broke your foundation.

They poisoned our wombs with the introduction of white death into our thriving communities to fund their terrorism. They gave your children guns and drugs. They taught your sons to give your daughters to them for money to fulfill their desires. They gave our children desires that pollute the mind and strip the essence of life. Our children were our hope, now our hope is being destroyed.

Black women you are a necessary ingredient the black man for the family. Black women have built up this shield of protection through generations, the “illusion of independence” to protect ourselves. I don’t believe out strength comes from weakening the black man. Our degrees should make you proud and show you it is possible. We don’t teach our daughter you will fail them, the new indetermination that you have been hand feed has taught them that. When we begin to get strong, they poison our youth into believing that we have equal opportunity. We have lost our fight and thoughts of freedom began to look like free housing, free food, free clothes, and free choice in multiple women.

I don’t agree black women aided in breaking the black man. I don’t agree that black women’s independence and education is hurting the black family. A home will not stand on a weak foundation. I do believe to make a home strong, what holds it needs to be strong. By building the black woman back up, she will than raise strong sons and daughter which will become strong mothers, fathers, husbands and wives.

Part of the problem is not understanding the plight, trials and tribulations of the black woman and putting the blame on us.


A very positive and good read is The murder of black women


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